Agoraphobia What do You do about it???

[Dottie]

I have read that quite a few of you have had agoraphobia during withdrawal.

What did you do about it and how did you get over it?

I have never had anything remotely like this and I don't know what to do about it.

I would appreciate any ideas that you can give me to get over this STRANGE side effect.

I really need your help.

Thanks Dottie

[Delynbetter]

No clue. My initial diagnosis 16 years ago was anxiety/panic disorder WITHOUT agoraphobia. We can drop the last two words of that diagnosis now. I think it actually happened WAY before the Paxil for me, though. My husband loves to go to the "ranch". I hate going out there because then I'm stuck in this rattlesnake haven of a canyon with no transportation and nothing near (except the critters) for miles.

[Suze]

Dottie, I think it's just about baby steps, whenever we can manage them.
Like eating pizza in the park with Brant the other night--I just told myself it was going to be ok, and like I said--I lived to tell about it.
Am I looking forward to the next time I leave the house/yard?--nope.
Will I do it again?--damn straight I will.

My current advantage over you, I suppose, is that I don't break down once I get back indoors. I'm just glad I'm there, and I don't have to "work" so hard at being "normal." I'm not sure that I could do it alone right now. When we were picking up the pizza, they only take cash so Brant walked down to the corner cash machine, and I stayed with the pizzas. A couple of men came in, and were a little overt in their attention seeking behaviour, so I hightailed it down the street after my sweetie, realizing I can be OUT but don't leave me ALONE! So inexplicably silly, when I've lived my life being independent and a true freedom seeker! <sigh>

If I were you, I would just keep trying with the baby steps. You went to the store that day. You drove your van a whole block and a half! And it wasn't pleasant, but you did do it. Does the thought of pizza in the park bring a pleasant thought to your head at all?

'Course you knew I'd say all this, didn't you. I hope you will get some interesting and appealing options posted!

Love you! xxoo

[elisa]

Dottie, if the baby steps you were taking were too much for you, then take super small baby steps.

Like sitting outside for a while, strolling around in the yard. Then, just little by little, increase those steps a little more until you are comfortable doing those things.

Then for instance, venture out in front of your home, stroll past your neighbour's houses.

Remember to give yourself a LOT of positive feedback, like "I DID IT!!"

Sometimes, we NEED to physically grab our bum and lift ourselves from the comfort of our chair and DO it. It demands a lot of willpower but it can be done.

Been there and done that (in my sixties).

[ooxenostaroo]

I have had it for a while or should i say had , when i first decided to battle this demon if u will . i would sit in the house but stare out the window for a bit , then decide to go out onto the front steps of my home , did this over n over , working my way to walking around at least in my yard..giving youself a reason to be outside works like ...yardwork...or if u have a pet play with it outside ...it kinda distracts you from the fear but subconciously ..ur winning the battle bc ur becoming familiar with outside life sounds etc which ...you may have sheltered yourself from and not even realised it...as with any shock to the system ...takes time and willpower... for me the mall was the top of that mountain all the noise people ..small spaces ..big spaces... being held up in lines...when i accomplished that i knew it was gonna be allright.... i also noticed ...not to sound "crazy" (sorry i dont like using that word please no-one get offended.) but talking to yourself in ur mind , reasuring telling yourself dont be nervous keep going .almost as if you are your own personal trainer helped me tremendously ... thats all i got thanks for reading

[zappelina]

I did it the hard way. For quite a long time I was scared stiff going to the supermarket but I kept forcing myself - I live alone and have to do it - I got rid of it quickly Reasoned with myself and told myself time after time that nobody would throw rotten eggs on me etc. But I must say my agaraphobia was worse coming off Valium.

[Buxy`s Back]

dottie,is this a new situation you have incurred since w/d? if it is i would take the advice from the peeps on here and push yourself a little each time,not too much to scare you right back into ur comfort zone.if this is w/d related then i would say it is something that will pass sooner or later,iv had the agrophobic thoughts like omg i cant deal with going out!!!!! but it comes and goes and i carry on venturing out,although in the bad times not by myself.wishing you all the best dottie uv endured so much lately but ur doing brill,you can and will beat this too ((hugs))

[Suze]

Hey John! second post and you're already helping ppl out!
Great attitude!

[Homerbcool]

Dottie...have you thought about a reward program

Set goals..super small baby steps like elisa said..when you meet these goals reward yuorself with something..a candy bar..a big hug from Lloyd...then as you get use to thesuper small steps, take small steps..reward yourself rather then destroying yourself...

and remember

we all are here to hold your hand along the way

[Homerbcool]

Also, when you do get back in..don't take the path of how aweful it was, notice something positive about the outside..pretty flowers, neighbors lawn...cute mailman...this will give you incentive to go out again....

[Scott]

i was severely agoraphobic last year.. i don't know what helps it.. i'm able to get out on a limited basis now but i still only do things i know i can get out of.. which means i'm still not working.

[Dottie]

Joanne,

Yes this is from the withdrawal as I never had anything remotely like this before, I went everywhere and did everything and never gave it a second thought.

Thanks Everyone for your answers.

Hugs Dottie

[Buxy`s Back]

well to me that seems good news as it passed for me when i cold turkied 3 years ago i dont know how but i just got my confidence back as im sure urs will come too.like i say iv had it in stages this w/d but it comes and goes but i do manage to get out.hang in threre dottie it will improve but the baby steps and great advice in this thread i would try to follow untill it does it will happen wishing you luck u deserve so much to be better x

[Caroline49]

Hello Dottie,

I've been agoraphobic since March when I tried coming off Paxil cold turkey. You remember me saying I couldn't leave my house.

Last week my son was here for a visit from KY and he brought two young women friends down with him. It was so very important to me to appear normal while they were here. We live in a small fishing village on the coast. There are maybe 25 residents here year round. There is a small family owned cafe over looking the water about 100 yds. from our home. I managed to walk down there when the kids were here. I also had to go get my husband one day because he ran out of gas on the side of the road!! There wasn't anyone else here who could go and get him. I drove 3 miles to where he was and back. I didn't stop anywhere, just there and back. I scared the heck out of my husband with my erratic driving!! The few times I went to the cafe the people there were so happy to see me out and about. That was one of my biggest fears Dottie, just seeing people and having to make conversation. If you knew me you would understand!! I used to be a chatter box!! Before Paxil and while taking paxil, then during withdrawal I was a hermit!! Just today I needed some things from the drugstore, heart medications, my husband had to go and get them for me because I'm still too uncomfortable to face the city.

Like they say, baby steps. I also walked around in my yard. I have three dogs and they love to play. I also have a bird feeder hanging in a tree off my upstairs deck. Each day the birds and squirrels keep that thing busy. Interacting with those wild creatures can be a little boost to the spirit too.

I'm praying for you Dottie and Lloyd too. My love to you both.

[Delynbetter]

On a good note, I don't spend near as much at the grocery store as before. Can't buy as much trotting down the aisles. Any other outings I make with friends or family, but always having that way out if things get to be too much for me. The possibility of being stranded does not allow me to be spontaneous...and drives hubby nuts.

I'm actually still working on the baby steps I've realized. But at least I can get out of the house...as long as I have a plan of escape if needed.

[ooxenostaroo]

Originally Posted by Suze

Hey John! second post and you're already helping ppl out!
Great attitude!

I belive you need to give out as much help as your recieve even if the person didnt directly help you karma works in strange ways lol

[Suze]

Originally Posted by ooxenostaroo

I belive you need to give out as much help as your recieve even if the person didnt directly help you karma works in strange ways lol

I'm with you on that John. It's the Law of Reciprocity in action.

[Caroline49]

Yes John, you are absolutely right about karma!! I'm a firm believer in that!!

It is truly better to give than to receive! You'll find lots of giving on this site. :-)

[feelin'_wiggy]

Dottie, I hope you rec'd my PM on this topic. Sorry I took a while to respond; was in one of my long slumbers. :-(

Agoragphobia has been a problem for me off and on before Paxil, and while taking it. A long time ago, I would use benzos. They work wonders until you stop taking them. Then the agorophobia comes back with a screaming vengeance.

In recent years, it comes in spells, varying in severity. It has been bad enough to cost me two jobs, and sometimes it passes after several days. This past year has been pretty bad, one reason I decided to make another attempt at PaxHell W/D. The crazy thing is that when I'm not agorophobic, I'm a very outgoing person. So, I used to make social commitments that I couldn't keep. Now, I tell people up front that I would love to attend, but I can't commit, and I tell them why. Only a few understand, so I've lost friends.

I always have to make an effort to break the spell and this is what I do. When I'm feeling a little better, I make a quick trip to the grocery or library, maybe the bank drive-thru lane, anyplace that is close to home and requires minimal personal interaction (the real scary part) and takes little preparation. Without fussing with my looks I grab my purse and go, telling myself that I'll be coming right back home. I even leave the TV and lights on so it doesn't feel like I'm really leaving. (I know that's crazy, but it works for me.) Once I make that initial break, I feel better. I'll chat with a friend when I get home or have dinner out with my hubby, somewhere small and quiet. Occasionally, I feel so much better once I'm out that I don't want to go home. This can be a problem if I rushed off without taking a little care with my looks. LOL

This latest bout, almost 3 weeks, came on when I started w/d, and has been awful. I've been afraid to open the front door to get the mail because I might have to say hello to a neighbor. Oh, I hate it!!!! But, I'm feeling like I might be able to venture out today if it stops raining. I really need some things from the store, and my hubby has to work late this week. I'll let y'all know if I make it.

[smhfly]

dottie in the first few months i was very agoraphobic. im not sure if was truly agoraphobia or just being afraid of going out and getting sick. it was terrible but its passed somewhat. it does get better. im at 6 months and its not nearly as bad as it was. hang in i just want this to all be over , for all of us suffering

[Dottie]

Wiggy,

We received your pm and we pm'd you back but don't know if you got it or not. Computers are the most frustrating pieces of crap I ever had to deal with. Works one way one day then the next who knows what will happen. I know, I know, it's operator error.

Thanks again everyone for your replys they are very helpful.

Hugs Dottie

[feelin'_wiggy]

Dottie,
I did receive your replies. Don't feel bad; messaging systems can be a little quirky.

Early today, I felt pretty good, so I started making a list of everything I wanted to do today. By the time I finished, I was so overwhelmed the anxiety started setting in. (Two days ago I dropped from 10 to 5 mgs, so that probably contributed to the anxiety, too.) Well, I put on the brakes and decided to aim for one task each day this week.

Early this evening I finally made it out of the house to buy magnesium and a few groceries. To avoid becoming flustered reading labels in the store, I shopped the drugstore's website beforehand and decided on the brand and quantity. The store was quiet and the magnesium was easy to find, but other bottles started catching my eye from different angles. I tried to look at the fish oil and vitamins, but I couldn't focus and my vision blurred. I started shaking. So, I hurriedly paid for my magnesium and left. Afterward, I stopped at the grocery for a few staple items that I can find blindfolded, so it wasn't difficult. When I returned home, I had a terrible headache and jitters from the experience in the drugstore.

Does anyone else feel overwhelmed when shopping and trying to make decisions? Do you have trouble seeing?

[Dottie]

Deborah,

I definately have trouble with all of that plus all the people moving around with shopping carts while I am trying to look at shelves of canned goods really messes me up and then the confusion starts to set in and all I want to do is to get out of there as fast as possible. Unfortunately for the hubby he has to do the grocery shopping and I can tell him what I want but I never know what he will bring home. Why didn't we teach them all this stuff when we were well????

As for the seeing, my vision is not anywhere near as good before this started and when looking at canned goods they all seem to blend togeather even though I am trying to look at one item.

We have managed to go for a walk two evenings in a row and I drove the van again yesterday with no accidents or tickets. (yea).

The mornings are the worst for me and then it gets a little better as the day wears on and I absolutely hate the weekends when the tv shows change all their schedules.

When I get home from some of the outings I have a melt down for about an hour or so but I will keep trying. I WANT MY LIFE BACK.

Hugs Dottie