Enjoying the REAL Me

[ksummer]

Hi,

I'm definitely struggling with withdrawal and at 6 months its pretty tough. But I really try to appreciate the good feelings of being paxil free and I thought I would post these because they're helpful to reflect on and also invite everyone to post what they are enjoying being paxil free.

These are some of the good things I'm feeling, enjoying and discovering. I enjoy not being hungry 24 hours a day. Its also great to actually taste my food. My weight is much healthier. My cholesterol is lower. I'm not dehydrated. I don't wake up with a terrible taste in my mouth.

I don't feel like a slug anymore - I have energy. I don't just sleep all the time. I feel so much more alive and awake. I see things I haven't paid attention to for years. I can think again (even if sometimes I'm thinking too much). I can remember things again. I experience pleasant memories again. I am able to see and experience and appreciate things more - like a sunset, a beautiful flower, the sound of the rain, etc...... I'm learning who I am after too many years on numbing paxil. I'm discovering what I really think about and what I really enjoy!

I think the one I am loving the most is being able to really feel again. I'm a very sensitive person and paxil took that special part away from me. I have it back now! I can feel!!! That's the absolute best part. And as much as that means that I also am feeling alot of things that are really difficult and painful - it means that I'm alive and I'm appreciating the days when I can feel the good, happy feelings. It feels wonderful to be connected to my real feelings again. These are just some of the many things that I am enjoying about the Real Me.

What are you enjoying about the Real You?

[LCrawford67]

What a wonderful post!!! Well, I'm not off, but I am down to 10.6 mgs and I notice a lot of the same things you notice. I cry more, I eat less, I sleep less, I have a better overall sense of "healthy."

I'm hoping, as I go lower in dose, to feel even better! Thank you for such an inspriring post!

[ash]

Hi,
good to have someone report on regaining their emotions, feelings... back.
I have just finished my taper and hoping to see a lot more of these.

Like you, I am still struggling with withdrawals but slowly getting the emotions is one big plus to date

[Sunnedaz]

My sentiments exactly, as every week I'm feeling better and better! I too, am "feeling" more, ever since I started to wean off of Paxil in January. I'm on liquid Paxil and am down to 1.7 ml (= 3.4 mg) and decreasing my dosage by
.1, so I'm not having side effects. Your email brought me to tears... as in good tears... as you knew exactly what I was experiencing! Thank you so much, for all of the encouraging words and support, as I couldn't have done it without everyones imput. Sunnedaz are actually here again!

[Cayte]

These are brilliant sentiments, and yes a very positive post.

[nicemom]

Congratulations to you. Isn't it wonderful to finally experience some of the 'good' things finally!!! Thank you for sharing that.

[Chrysalis]

What am I enjoying about the "real" me?

Like you, I have much more energy, I enjoy my food way more but eat way less, and have lost a bunch of Paxhell weight.

And hooboy, do I have feelings again!

On days like today, when I feel good, I'm enjoying that positive, bouncy feeling, like I'm ready to take the tiger by the tail.

Unfortunately, there are still days like one I had earlier this week, when I was so down I wondered about going back to Paxhell because I never "felt" much at all when on the full dose.

I'm not fully off it yet. Down to 0.9 mg (0.45 ml liquid).

Thanks for that post, Ksummer. Hope you continue to feel better and better all the time.

Margaret

[Chrysalis]

Who was that person that posted 2 & 1/2 hours ago that she had the tiger by the tail today??

Now here I sit with tears rolling down my face for no good reason....sad songs on the radio, maybe...saline overflow...

Such is the chitty nature of this beast....

Are we having fun yet?

Margaret

[LCrawford67]

Yeah, but isn't nice that a song can actually make you cry again?? I actually missed that.

[Chrysalis]

Originally Posted by LCrawford67

Yeah, but isn't nice that a song can actually make you cry again?? I actually missed that.

Yes, in the overall picture, it is good to feel again. And the trip from feeling "tops" to feeling "bottom" isn't always so sudden and in such stark contrast.

The sudden plunges for no apparent reason just seem to come out of nowhere now and then. (Thanks, Paxhell.)

It's sunny and warm and gorgeous and a Friday afternoon, so I'm sure I'll bounce fairly quickly this time.

Margaret

[Cayte]

You have a point there Laurie. After my stressful session with the counsellor where i sobbed..it felt strangely releasing. I try not to cry in front of others.

[LCrawford67]

It's really hard getting use to doing that, especially if you've been on this crap for a long time. I know, it's strange for me to start feeling all these emotions again, after 11 years.

Now, I can't say Paxil totally numbed me, I did cry and I had no problem with laughter. But, I didn't cry as much and I found myself a lot more incredulous than I really am. It's nice to actually be a "nicer" person as my dose decreases.

[jmendez]

Hey,
That is awesome! I am so glad that you are having such a great expirience after all you have gone through and it proves to me that i too can do it. I could only imagine the numbness that you have gone through, but know you have rebirthed again and could feel the good and the bad. Just make sure that you don't take these feelings for granted because now you are alive and could do anything as long as you put your heart, soul and mind to. Enjoy yourself.

Jocelyn Mendez