Scared but trying...

[TryingToQuit]

Well, I've been on Paxil for about 8 years now I think. I've tried to quit (unsuccessfully) twice, both times during the winter months since my husband has a seasonal job and would be home to deal with everything I couldn't. However, I'm not the best winter person. I feel very cooped up to begin with, etc., so I thought trying to wean during a better season might work (even though my husband is back at work and barely home). I have twin 12-year-old sons and a 10-year-old daughter. They are great kids, and I have to admit my husband of 13 years is great too (very patient with me). Anyway... I started weaning on June 8th from 20mg. paxil to 15, then on June 16, went down to 10 because I thought I was feeling pretty well. I started not doing too great a few days ago, and after reading many posts on this site, realized I was definitely weaning too quickly. So yesterday I went back up to 15mg and plan to stay there for a bit. I have not consulted my doctor this time because I already know the plan that he would have me on didn't work last time, and he did mention the idea of 2 weeks on, 2 weeks off due to PMS problems. That makes me think that I wouldn't be getting the correct advice anyway. I know I started weaning quickly this time, but that's because I truly believed I could handle it and just want to be off the stuff. I hate not 'feeling' any more. I'm 41 and can't remember when I last was truly happy. I'm very stubborn, so I hate to admit defeat, or admit that my behavior or feelings are due to a medication, or weaning from a medication. I guess I like to believe I'm more in control of myself than that. Anyway, I'm nervous/scared about doing this. I don't want my kids to 'suffer' through this with me. I've explained to them what I'm doing so they understand as much as they can considering their ages.

Anyway, I'm sorry for the long, somewhat confusing post. I just wanted to 'bite the bullet' and actually post something I guess to see if anyone has any advice, ideas, suggestions, words of wisdom. I want it to work this time. I really want to get back in control of my life and not feel like I'm controlled by a medication.

Thanks for reading!
MBF

[Gibby]

I'm no expert here but will give you my 2 cents. I think you did the right thing by going back up to 15mg and stay there until you feel you are ready to taper again. When you feel you are stable then you should follow the advice on here and only cut your dose 10% of the current dose you are taking. You've been on Paxil for 8 years, so that's quite along time and it's going to probably take you awhile to get off of it, but if you take it slow you will be okay.

You have apparantly realized what it's doing to you because you said you want to feel again and that's a pretty good indication that your lights have come back on and you know that it's the paxil that has caused you to be so blah.

Stick around here and the people on this site will help you and if you just listen to them, they will get you off of the paxil and feeling again. I think once you start to taper, you will start feeling things again. It may be slow getting there, but it does start to come back around.

Good Luck

[LCrawford67]

Welcome to Paxil Progress!

I can certainly understand wanting to get off of Paxil, but believe me...faster isn't better.

You've been on this drug for eight years, it's going to take time and patience to taper successfully and comfortably.

We recommend 10% of your current dose, every 3-6 weeks depending on how you feel. So, 15 mgs you'd drop to 13.5 and so on. It'll be much easier to do this if you can get a script of liquid Paxil from your doctor.

I tried two other times to stop this drug, one cold turkey and one very fast taper. Both were disastrous. When I found this site and tapered the right way and here I am! I'll be six months Paxil free on Sunday!

Yes, it took me just over a year, but the thing to remember is this isn't just about getting off the drug. It's about maintaining quality of life and this is as important as the actual goal. As long as you're decreasing in dose, that's all that matters.

[TryingToQuit]

Thank you for your support! I know that the smart thing to do is to wean slowly, and my husband will not allow me to do otherwise (and unfortunately I'm a bad liar so I wouldn't be able to hide it if I went too quickly). I'm just wondering, do you hear from anyone that they have had no problems weaning from this drug? I guess I just want to know if it's even possible to get off it successfully without wd symptoms. I'm fearful of using the symptoms that I read about as excuses or crutches. I mean some of what I read about can just be from life in general and not as a result of the drug. How do I even tell the difference? I want to be strong, like 'mind over matter,' but wonder if that's a possibility with paxil.

[Katesmom]

There are people who have an easy time of it. Those people don't need the support of a website. Keep that in mind as you read through here.