Paxil Free for Two years!!!!!!!!!!

Hi Darcy,
I thought that on my second year anniversary of being "paxil-free", that I would come back to the message centre that I at one time in my life frequented daily in my quest to rid myself of the drug paxil.............and say, to everyone who is either trying to get off the drug or has just recently taken your last pill............. that there is life after paxil, the withdawal symptoms slowly subside, life returns to normal with all the wonderful feelings and emotions that were meant to be a part of our lives, the fog lifts, the weight comes off...
And you begin to wonder why you ever looked for the answer to your problems in a pill bottle.....well, at least I did.
I was at one time in my life literally paralyzed by panic/anxiety. I learned behavioral techniques that helped me overcome it. Paxil didn't cure the problem, I did........Paxil only masked my problems, made me lethargic, tired, apathetic with a capital "A", fat, and a total mess.
I thank God every day that I had the sense to get off this drug after taking it for over three years and to regain my life back.
Darcy and his web site helped me more than I can express, and although I don't come here very often anymore, he and I stay in touch, and from reading these messages today I can see that he is still tirelessly and selflessly helping others ..............
Darcy you are a special person, one of these days I will see you on Oprah or Dr. Phil I know it.......
Take care,
Beth..............

[Cindy]

Dear Beth,

I agree with what you say about Darcy wholeheartedly...he is a wise soul...and has become somewhat of a "personal guru" for me as well as many on this board.

Anyway, now that you are two years paxil free I guess I would like to pick your brain a little. I have been paxil free for almost five months....and I went off way too fast...and suffered very intense withdrawal symptoms because of it.

I, like you, after five and a half years of being on paxil feel that I must get to the root of my anxiety without a "magic pill". I am curious if your panic returned after you discontinued paxil? The really intense "panic" I experienced during withdrawal and for about two months after has basically subsided...but I still fight the "anticipatory anxiety wall" on many occasions...and sometimes I find I just get "stuck" in the house again..."afraid". I am going to a counselor, and trying very hard to participate in "self-care" for the first time in my life...but sometimes I become very frustrated, and impatient...because generalized anxiety or panic does not fit with the me I want to be...the me I know I am capable of being.

If you would be willing to share some of your behavioural techniques, I would be grateful. How long after taking your last pill did you really feel like "you again"...or as Darcy likes to say the "new re-invented you"? I know that I will never be the same person again...and that's okay...but damn, how I would love to get rid of the "worry".

Thanks, and Congratulations!

Cindy

Hi Cindy,
First, congrats on you being paxil-free too!!........How fast did you come off?
No, I never had the severe panic feelings after being off. I was one who was essentially over the panic when my family doc thought I should just take the paxil as "insurance" that it not come back. I went on it too willingly and then of course the rest is history I guess........
I went to a behavioral counselor for many years, and she first got to the root of why I was so anxiety ridden.........for me it was an extreme fear of "death"........I always thought I was going to have a heart attack and die, always checking my pulse etc.....it was awful.
She had me write out cards that I kept in my wallet that said something to the effect that "Panic is very uncomfortable, but I have never died from it, and the attack usually subsides in approx. 15 mins"......also I wore a rubber band around my wrist and when the feelings started I would snap it, kind of like "snapping myself" out of the panic cycle before it started.
I also tried alot of other distraction techniques and as the panic attacks became less and less, I gained more and more confidence that I could go out in public and do normal things like grocery shopping etc without feeling like I had to run to my car and go home........
I am now 7 years without a panic attack..........This past year I went through a major surgery and I did fine........I was very proud of myself by the way, hehe...........It really put to the test all of my behavioral techniques and strength!!
I personally think it takes quite a while for all of the effects of paxil to be out of your system. I won't quote a time period, but I would say more than 5 months. I still get an occ. "zap", so I know that this drug is very powerful, and it saddens me so much to still see those TV ads touting it like it's a vitamin..........
It's harder to deal with anxiety/panic on your own Cindy, it's more work. Easier to take a pill, veg out and not care about anything. But that's no way to live as you probably found out.
When you start to "truly" believe within yourself that you, Cindy, are as special as everyone else, you have alot of very important things to say, and you can do anything you really want to, well............then you'll be able to be the person you want to be and live the life you want. In the end, I think it's really very simple, we just make it so hard.
When you were a child, did you have panic attacks? If not, take a clue from the behavior of children.........
Yes, isn't Darcy wonderful.......there are alot of books that he suggests to that are very helpful.
Please take care of yourself,
Beth (one of the "original" Paxil progress message board-ers)

Hi Cindy,
Congrats on being paxil free for 2 years, and remembering the rest of us by posting your good news. I've been off paxil for 6 months now, took it for 6 years at 20 mg, tapered down to 5 over a 2 year period. Now, out of 7 days, I'm cranky 4. Question: How long was it before you felt like yourself all the time? Your response would be greatly appreciated, I'm wondering how much longer before I can really feel clean from this.
Thanks,
Joyful angel "wannabe"

Hi Beth,
I'm eagerly waiting for your reply - I can't tell you how encouraging it is to me that you have been paxil-free for 2 years! Can you tell me how long it took before you felt completely symptom-free?

I took paxil for 6 yrs and have been off for 6 months, the longest I've ever lasted. On previous 4 attempts, the longest I lasted was 4 months after which I couldn't stay off any longer. This time, tho, I've done things differently - natural detoxing, supplements and a lot more support. But I still struggle with it at times.

I look forward to your reply!
Joy

Hi Joy,
Just happened to check the message centre and saw your message....and of course congrats on being paxil free!!!
It took me approx. three months to withdrawal from paxil, using the liquid paxil. From the 10mg. mark on down I went down by 1mg/week until I was to 0. I would say I was for the most part symptom free when I stopped....but totally symptom free probably took a good six months.
I would think that everybody is individual when it comes to this, so my experience may be totally different from yours.
My only remaining symptoms are an occ. "zap" and my short term memory and word recall are not good at all........I am convinced that my brain chemistry will be forever altered due to this drug, and as I have said before I am so grateful that I had the good sense to get off of it when I did.
Please, please please don't go back on the paxil!!........I'm not generally in the habit of telling people what to do, only providing support. But the on and off the drug is probably the worst thing you can do to yourself.
Let me know how you are doing. It sounds like you took alot of time and thought to get off the paxil this time. I would think that this time will be the "charm" for you...........Bid paxil farewell forever!!!!!!

Take care,
Beth

Beth,
Thank you, thank you, thank you, for your reply!!! I can't tell you how encouraging it is to hear your words, especially the part about being symptom-free after 6 months. Tomorrow, 2/10/03 is my 6 month anniversary, and I just KNOW, the worst is behind me, and things will only get better.

Yes, I do think this time I definitely have kissed Paxil goodbye. And I'm getting my life back, my marriage back, and hoping to move forward in my work as well. It's a miracle to have kept a job thru this!

I am overJOYed to hear your feedback, and to have this site to come to for comfort and sanity. Congrats to you, and thanks again for checking on this site! :P
Joy

Dear Everyone:

February 2003 marks my seventh month since I completely came off Paxil. For the most part, the withdrawal symptoms (acute anxiety/panic/scary racing thoughts) are not as bad as they were back in October and November of 2002. I am slowly transitioning back into real life, but am terrified now. The slightest stress breaks me down and I can only work close to my home. I used to be a corporate attorney, used to high stress levels and a long commute, but now I can't even handle a very simple job. I'm so tired of withdrawal and the horrible anxiety, but I feel like at the same time I can't move forward. I am very happy that I have the support of my family, but I so want to put this all behind me. Anyone out there who has been through this stage, please advice.

Thank you,
Alexis Wen

Hi Alexis,
I've been off for 6 months now, and here are specific things I've done that have produced results for me to alleviate the anxiety/panic/racing thoughts:
- 5-htp, 100-150mg at night: relieves depression
- sublingual b-12: relieves anxiety
- 1000/600mg calcium/magnesium supplement - relieves the racing thoughts. I like to take liquid, it's easier for the body to absorb.
- detoxing in its various forms is very helpful too, especially when things are at their lowest, the body is releasing a lot of toxins, so detoxing helps clean up the system fast.
- And of course, therapy does wonders too.
I know we all want to get over this, and get over this NOW. But it is also teaching us to be patient with ourselves, and others. Asking our higher power for guidance has been a big help for me. This is recovery, and recovery can be a slow, forward/backward/forward-again process. Someday we will look back and commend ourselves for our strength, and we will have learned compassion along the way. -Joy