Paxil free for 1 month

I've been Paxil free for one month, after being on and off of it (and several other antidepressents) for 2 years. I have to say it has been hell. I want to be off of everything for a while and I know I can do it, but it's been so tough. I gave my body a couple weeks to adjust, and have been taking some really good nutritional supplements and exercise. I'm just still so emotional at times. The first week was pure hell, and I'm glad to be alive, quite frankly.
Can anyone tell me if I'll ever be the me that I was before Paxil? I remember I was just a young woman with a low grade depression, who was helped tremendously by talk therapy. Now I feel as though I'm still losing my mind a month later. Will this get any better? What has helped others? 5-htp? St. John's Wort?
Thank you!

Annabell,

To answer some of your questions: The first was will you ever be the same person you were before paxil... No you won't, but this is not a bad thing! You are now more aware of your body and it's needs, you are now more informed about the pharmacutical companies and their betrayals...you have learned that doctors don't know everything...And most importantly you have learned that you are STRONG!!!
You have been through the mill and back again...emotionally and physically before the paxil and then after the paxil. But you have made it and will continue to move forward!!!

To answer your second question, if you will stop feeling so emotional etc... Answer YES! It does get better in time. The first couple of months, especially the first month I noticed I would get emotional over nothing in a second. I felt very edgy and frustrated. The emotions came in these weird waves... I would be fine, but then I could feel this underlying feeling of Blah, Sadness, Anger, Frustration, etc... you name it... However this is just your brain readjusting itself from being on a mood enhancing drug. It will take about another month and you will begin to feel more like a real person.

I have heard fish oil is good, some people hear swear by it! I don't know much about St. John's wart, but I have heard that some of what is sold is not the real thing, so if you want to try it I would suggest a real health food store, and speaking with a pharmacist too...

The best thing to do with yourself to get through the hard days is to find a project and keep busy. Drink alot of water, stay away from caffeine, sugars and fatty foods, and exercise will raise the endorphins, which will help your emotional state.

Never fear, you have made it this far, you will feel better and better as time goes on. However you still will have tough days... ride them out as everyone has these!

CONGRATULATIONS on your progress so far!
My Best,
Dianna

Diana, thank you for the reply and words of encouragement. Today is officially my one month mark for being Paxil-free. The St. John's wort is just giving me headaches and making me really sensitive to light, so I think I'm going to get off of it. The Omega fatty acids are helping, as well as the multivitamins. I'm still feeling so "out of it" that's the only way to describe it. I don't even think I should be driving really. I feel kind of dazed. Will that go away?
Thanks again,
Anna

[safarigal]

Annabel,

I've been off Paxil almost 2 months now. I still get that weird spacey feeling, but not very often. I know what you mean about driving and getting that weird feeling. When I'm like that, I have to really focus on my driving and pay extra attention. I'll even put on some good music.
It works.

Annabell,

Yes the spacey thing sucks... dazed and confused, haha!
It will also start to go away too. But driving is still difficult for me, especially at night. I do alot of highway driving, and I get tense just getting on and off it... I think the speed of things around us is what does it. Just focus on the road and your driving, and like safari girl mentioned, music is good too, to tune out the fears etc...
I have some books on tape, that focus my attention away from my fears and on the topic I am listening to.
It does get better in time though.
We are trying to regain a sense of security with ourselves, so some of it is our inner fears and not just the lack of drug.
I had several days of being out of it at first. It's like a disconnection from ourselves...this is normal...it doesn't feel that way but it is because of the adjustment the brain is making.
We numbed our feelings for so long, that now without the drug the mind is spacey looking for the med... It does get better in time.

If you can, take a day or two off from work and just give yourself some time for your mental health. Get things done at home you have been putting off, watch a good movie, take a bubble bath... basically nuture yourself! Take it easy you have been through so much, and yes although a month is a GREAT accomplishment, but remember it has only been a month, after years of medications changing the way you felt and functioned. It is a normal reaction to feel disconnected.

My best to you,
Dianna