Remeron question Help... having a hard time

[Jaqueline]

Hi everyone:
I was on 30 mg remeron and not realizing it jumped off to 15 then 7.5 then 3 in a very short time.. 2 to 2 1/2 weeks. I was wrong. Then I had a huge reaction as bad as when I unknowingly cold turkeyed off xanax without knowing anything about it. I felt like I was in hell for 2 days. Then someone on this site helped me and told me to go back up and reinstate. I went up to 15 mg.for the past 2 nights and had a good day yesterday But, today an super vulnerable, can't focus, can't concentrate, very tense, mind all over the place.. rather had to be in any semblance of peace. So, I am thinking that I should go back up the 30 mg where I jumped off from and stay there for several months and then very slowly go down.

Any thoughts? As the day progresses I am in more negative feeling states of mind and tension and difficulty. Also should I take the 30mg if I do all at one which I was doing at night or can I take some very soon. I can't handle this distress. Someone suggested staying on 15 mg and in a few days I would feel better.

Help
Jaqueline

[texgirl]

I'm confused by your signature. Did you also quit Valium a week ago? Did you taper off it, or CT?

[TryingtoGetWell]

I'm confused too! But a few things jump out at me. Were you taking the valium regularly (every day), even short-term?

Remeron can be very hard to get off of from what people tell me. It certainly can be done, but if I understand correctly that you're taking it every other day, that is going to cause problems (or already is). Please start taking the last dose at which you felt comfortable (even if not symptom-free, but bearable) every day at the same dose until we sort all this out.

As for the valium, if you were taking a dose every day or close to that, for at least a week or two (and certainly if you were doing so longer), then you may not be able to just jump off it. Especially not with the med history you describe.

If you were only taking the valium occasionally (like once or twice a week), that probably won't be an issue. But if you've been taking it daily or almost daily recently, you need to go back to the last dose you were on and take the same dose every single day (at about the same time of day).

I understand you don't remember the exact details of the meds you've been on in recent years, but if you can piece together some of the history (dates, dosages) we can help you plan a bearable and safe way to get off them.

Would you be able to have your pharmacy print out a list of what you were prescribed when - and what doses - to have that help jog your memory in listing your med history? (At least going back for the last year, if they can't do longer.)

And starting now, please put a little notepad near your pills and list what you take (and dosage) each day at what time, every time you take a pill, okay?

[Jaqueline]

Hi everyone and thanks for your help.
I need to clarify my drug history since my memory is so bad.

I took xanax 5 years ago due to anxiety over a financial concern for several months. I then got worse anxiety and insomnia and started to fall apart.
Went C/T off xanax and went psychotic and totally insomniac and no sleep for 5 months. Then I was put on various antideptressants and benzo's for five years and had ECT. I was diagnosed as having major depressive disorder. I feel it was all benzo tolerance related and not due to major depression so I was misdiagnosed with no possible help.

I then ended up at a hospital for a study and found out that I had been on benzos for five years and they were physically addictive. So, I started to wean off the valium that I was currently on. I succesfully weaned off valium 10 weeks ago so am benzo free now. However, I am on 15 mg remeron. I was just having a wonderful window or I thought I was out of the dark phase of the withdrawals because I felt great fro 2 weeks and I made the mistake of tapering down the remeron in 2 weeks from 15 mg to 0. Then I crashed in a horrific state where I felt suicidal for 2 days. Then reinstated on the 15 mg remeron and came out of it for 1 day of relative peace and then the next two days of vulnerability and lack of being able to think, go places... back into the deptression, fear, etc.

All this (the suicidal part and the good and depression) was in the past few days. Now I am depressed again and feeling hopeless. I was hoping reinstating on remeron would make me feel better than this... it did for the one day. Also, I brought myself out of the great feeling I was in for the 2 weeks I think, but going off the remeron so fast. I am tired of this and in despair right now.


I will clarify my history if I can figure out how to do so.

Thanks
Jaqueline

[TryingtoGetWell]

Hi, Jaqueline!

I read your PM and will reply after I've gotten some sleep (it's bedtime for me now!).

But I wanted to ask - what was your dose on this most recent course of benzo (valium)? Specifically, how many mgs. per day?

And can you give us an idea of your weaning schedule? (Don't be embarrassed if it was too fast - most of us have done that, not knowing it was too fast, or even by following ill-advised taper schedules given to us by doctors. I say this as someone who has been on and off various benzos a number of times - don't even know how many, actually - in my life.)

What would help us to help you concerns this most recent withdrawal from valium that you went off of just this last month, I gather. How large were the drops in dose (mgs. or fractions of mgs. reduction when you dropped in dose) and about how often (how long on a dose before you dropped again in dose)?

It can take quite a while to recover from too-fast tapers from benzos. (Believe me, I know - in fact, that's how I got put on paxil ) So sorry to keep asking you for more information, but those dose amounts and schedule of how long you stayed at each dose before dropping (as close as you can remember is fine), will really help.

And are you taking the remeron daily now (same dose each day at about the same time)?

[texgirl]

You say you quit Valium 10 weeks ago, but I still want to know how long you spent tapering off it and from what dose. I think that might be a factor here.

(Sorry for echoing what TTGW said; she and I posted at the same time!)