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-   Paxil and Withdrawal FAQ-Updated 4/2008 (https://www.paxilprogress.org/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=14)
-   -   Learn about yourself (https://www.paxilprogress.org/forums/showthread.php?t=8763)

Ariella 12-22-2004 08:18 AM

Learn about yourself
 
Ultimately, Paxil and Paxil withdrawal will place you in situations of spontaneous decisions, reflection and deep introspection. You may be or have already been challenged, pushed, pulled, silenced, spread too thin, stuffed inside, yelling out loud and a crying, laughing, fearing, conquering, defeating, submitting or dominating. Nuances will become rushing waves and rushing waves spinning tornadoes. Through all this, just when you thought the world was getting mean on you, youíll notice that youíve been learning all about yourself.

Surprise! The Paxil experience is always about you and your relationship with yourself in terms of mind, body and spirit. Not that Paxil is unique, all of life does this, but it certainly makes it plainly obvious!

You will grow. You will be better than normal. If you think being normal is about not having to experience anything and never changing, then it would be normal to not have been born at all, which is just silly. Life happens. Normalcy does not.

Here's what we're going to help you look at:
  • How could you face the Paxil / Withdrawal challenge
  • Hidden emotional agendas
  • Quick-fix ruts
  • Your relationship with yourself and/or Deity (optional)

Ariella 12-22-2004 08:25 AM

How can I face the Paxil / Withdrawal challenge?
 
When faced with a tough challenge, do you slam, push, pierce or retreat? What amount of faith do you hold that no matter what approach you choose, youíll eventually get through it? If thereís an easy way and a hard way through the challenge, each with equal rewards, which one do you choose? How you answer these questions affects your experience with Paxil withdrawal directly.

We suggest you make a priority: YOU. Once you have a better grasp on yourself and how you deal with adversity, youíll have less searching to do when dealing with things, and everybody you give your time to will benefit.

You can't give what you don't have, so if you're to be there for others, you have to be there for yourself quite litterally.

So, face Paxil and withdrawal as something you will move through with greater knowledge and skill over time. No matter how little or great the support you receive, you will still progress because it is YOUR journey and all you have to do to stay on it, is breathe. Just breathe.

Ariella 12-22-2004 09:10 AM

How do I know if I have a hidden emotional agenda?
 
You look at how you RE-act based on prior experiences versus how you ACT in the moment. You are taught who to be your whole life, and this can work against you when you seek a new direction for your life.

You may experience withdrawal symptoms that feel like depression, and because it triggers a sense of familiarity, you may mistakingly think it's a previous depression returning when in reality it's just a short term symptom. As natural as this is, it does get in the way of your ability to recognize withdrawal symptoms as they happen. The process of remembering WHAT ONCE happened predisposes you to ignore what IS happening.

But that only scratches the surface. We've used the term 'emotional agenda' for a good reason. Consider the following amusing scenario:
Quote:

Imagine youíre standing in a checkout lane and you break wind. Youíre not sure if it was loud enough for another to hear, but as soon as youíre done, you hear the person right behind you snort and let out a little chuckle. Probably laughing at you right?
But are they? Would you have asked them to find out, or would you have just assumed that it was about you because of the level of embarrassment you felt which put you on the defensive and looking for a reaction from the world? How much eye contact did you automatically seek to see if anybody noticed? Why does it matter but to give you more validation for your own programmed/chosen level of embarassment?

You probably learned a long time ago that passing gas was unfavorable depending on your gender, public position and so on. This is emotional agenda RE-acting, when you donít act according to the moment with acceptance, but according to emotional instructions from the past made so automatic from excessive repitition, you donít even challenge it for its worth anymore.

Despite the humour in the example, consider the weight of this automatic process in terms of the stigma to mental health, your self judgment and self worth, or discrimination.

If you're on Paxil and/or going through a withdrawal from it, you need to be made aware that what you think about the experience and your progress in it, may have little accuracy compared to how well you really are doing.

Ariella 12-22-2004 09:45 AM

What is a quick-fix rut and how can I avoid one?
 
A quick-fix rut is when you spend your time avoiding discomfort despite the fact that avoiding it now, does nothing to prevent it, so you become trapped always having to avoid, and are never free of it.

You avoid quick-fix ruts by NOT labelling discomfort as wrong. Have you noticed that it hurts when you get cut? Why is that? Is it not to call your attention to it? What if you were medicating away your ability to feel the cut? Would it not become neglected and take longer to heal? Anxiety and depression, are cuts.

Anxiety and depression, are all pain responses to get your attention aimed towards the parts of yourself that need healing. If you want to avoid a quick-fix rut when it comes to your mental health, you have to let yourself be OK with anxiety and/or depression long enough so that you can focus on it.

Even if there is a drug that calms things down enough to help you focus on healing, taking a drug still enforces a behavior and belief that you are too afraid to do it alone. Being afraid of something (including insufficient comfort) create all desires for quick-fix solutions in the first place, and a rut can start that way. If you're aware of the process, you can avoid getting caught in the rut, but most do not and just take take take whatever feels good good good because they're afraid afraid afraid, and ignore permanent long-term healing in favor of momentary relief. Notice how the fear never gets addressed and is only temporarily distracted? Groovy baby; welcome to the rut.

Resist the urge to be automatically made comfortable due to fears you have about the discomfort(s). Have faith in yourself. You could be missing an opportunity to heal, for good.

Ariella 12-22-2004 10:12 AM

What relationship to myself/deity can I cultivate?
 
We admit that many people like who they are on antidepressants. We often ask if they like themselves because of what they can do or because of who they are. Since doing comes from being (you act like a nurse when you believe yourself to be), you need to BE before you can DO.

Paxil cannot help you BE, it can only help you DO by suppressing the challenges of being while those same challenges are supposed to contribute to the creation of your being. You donít give love without first being loving and although it may seem like Paxil can make you more loving by calming self possessing depressions or anxieties, you should know that you were loving without Paxil and perhaps hadnít quite figured out (yet) how to bring it out of the depression.

Whenever you learn how to be who you are despite a challenge, the challenge is no longer a challenge but an opportunity for you to declare yourself.

Who are you anyway? Decide. Let the relationship to yourself be one of potential and creativity. You're human and constantly growing and learning. Since you're never done becoming, then there's no point being harsh on who you were, because it was just a snapshot in time and doesn't apply to the you of today, and even if there are similarities, wait until tomorrow when you could be different yet again.

Is a seed not a tree, waiting to grow? Should we blame the seed for not being a seed yet? What if the environmental conditions weren't right yet?

What if you're a seed and your environmental conditions haven't been right until today? Should you judge whoever you were being last week or 5 years ago? NO.

Let the past be the past because it's past.

Embrace the now because it is happening now, the only moment you can do embracing in.

Dream of the future as it exists only in dreams.


And then choose to create whatever aspect of yourself you want to, if it's from a dream or not. Relate to yourself as an ocean of loving potential with words like "not yet, but already on they way".


Deity means life. If you believe in none, one or several, anyone can agree that we are alive and got that way somehow. It doesn't matter how for this discussion. Let's just say that we are alive, a-live, all-live, a-life, all life.

So, you're alive for some reason. Let's get your mind working in a useful way:

Are you happy about it?

If not, why not?

And if not, when not?

Is life really just subject to momentary judgment, each moment slipping
away as fast as the next?

And if so, are your greatful that it is that way or not?

Do you need to be proven why it's good to have a belief before you adopt one, or do you make them up on your own based on your own life experiences and reality?

Which one works best at creating a sense of freedom and independence?

Which one do you suppose promotes healing?

The answers to all those questions can greatly heal your life and reveal to you the answers about yourself, and your relationship with your life/deity.


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