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Health Challenges Anxiety, depression, OCD, headaches, weight and more.

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Old 04-12-2012, 12:33 PM   #1
moksha
 
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Chemically castrated

That is how I feel. I have been off Paxil for 3 weeks now. Before that I was on and off Paxil for 10 years, sometimes on 20mg, mostly on 10mg or 5mg:

20th July 2011: Came down from 5mg to 4mg

11th August: 2.5mg

11th September: 2mg

11th December: 1.25mg

7th February 2012: 0.9mg

22nd March: stopped

As you can see, I was on a very low dose previous to stopping, yet my sex drive is just non-existant. I am a very healthy 35 year old man: don't drink, don't smoke, jog every day, live on vegetables and fruit and used to have a high sex drive...but now everything is dead. My penis is totally numb, I barely ejaculate anything, can only get erections manually etc. I just can't believe this has happened. A medicine prescribed for me by a qualified doctor, packaged by a pharmacist and taken on trust has simply destroyed my entire sexual being. It makes me so furious. I just want to kill the bastards who have made a fortune selling this filthy poison..arrgggh . People shudder when they read of the things doctors did in the Middle Ages, but I bet even the worst of them never succeded in shutting down the sex life of healthy young people.

I am trying to stay positive; I know some people have recovered, but I've read so many horror stories of others 5 or 10 years off SSRIs with no sign of recovery. Someone posted a video on PSSD on youtube which I wish I hadn't watched. Underneath are endless posts with thing like "yeah...me too, 6 years off and no sex drive " etc I just don't know what to do. I genuinely don't see any point going on if it means a lonely, sexless future. I know it is too early to say, but over the last 7 months there hasn't been the slightest change- not a glimmer of hope.
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Old 04-12-2012, 01:47 PM   #2
babs
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Re: Chemically castrated

But you've only been off Paxil for 3 weeks ... this is much too soon to give up. There are lots of success stories here from guys who have recovered their sexual function, but it generally took months, not weeks. I think you should stay away from sites that have horror stories because it's just going to freak you out and make you feel worse. People absolutely recover from this.
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Old 04-12-2012, 02:22 PM   #3
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Re: Chemically castrated

Yes look up threads by Brunyan. He has completely recovered from that aspect! You will get there!
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My story ends with finding out I have Lyme disease which caused my nervous system and hormones to go haywire. Currently in treatment.
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Old 04-12-2012, 03:14 PM   #4
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Re: Chemically castrated

Quote:
Originally Posted by moksha View Post
but I've read so many horror stories of others 5 or 10 years off SSRIs
Those are horror stories which:
a.) are not to be viewed upon as being true since we odnt know all the facts or the medical history of that person.
b.) paxil is a *****,..but dont forget that there are plenty of people who can stop paxil without much problems. I know of 4 people in my real life who quit paxil after several years of use. And they quit in a few weeks. Never forget that the people on this forum are the "extreme" cases. We react very badly to it.
But there is no reason to think you will be someone whom has probs 4 years after. Stay realistic and therefore optimistic
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14 years on Paxil 20 mg cause of a bad anxiety disorder (social anxiety, agoraphobia)
2011 Oct 16th: Cold turkey stop Paxil cause of poopout and switch to lexapro 15 mg. Hell started. Tapered lexapro. Tapered oxazepam. Med-free for 16 months. Now on Anafranil (clomipramine)


"....We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality. It can not command, only serve..."
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Old 04-12-2012, 03:18 PM   #5
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Re: Chemically castrated

People who don't have problems with paxil, don't make You tube videos. As Bilo pointed out, you have no idea what the reality is with people, or what their history is.

Patience.
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Old 04-12-2012, 03:29 PM   #6
moksha
 
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Re: Chemically castrated

Thanks everyone. I know you are right. I just feel so damn angry and hopeless sometimes. I would rather have spent the last ten years smoking weed and taking ecstasy tablets. I have no doubt they would have done me less harm. I never dreamed that an anti-depressant could have left me numb from the waist down.
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Old 04-12-2012, 03:42 PM   #7
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Re: Chemically castrated

Quote:
Originally Posted by moksha View Post
Thanks everyone. I know you are right. I just feel so damn angry and hopeless sometimes. I would rather have spent the last ten years smoking weed and taking ecstasy tablets. I have no doubt they would have done me less harm. I never dreamed that an anti-depressant could have left me numb from the waist down.
I have a feeling some of those "horror stories" of people 5-10 years out, may have also used weed or ecstasy and not disclosed that info. I've seen it happen here.

Not saying Paxil doesn't mess people up on it's own, just saying, I think most people heal, if other factors aren't involved. Alcohol can cause issues too.
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Old 04-12-2012, 03:44 PM   #8
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Re: Chemically castrated

I'm so sorry you are feeling so frustrated moshka! You will get better! Sending you prayers and (((((hugs)))))!
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Old 07-13-2012, 12:51 AM   #9
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Re: Chemically castrated

Quote:
Originally Posted by moksha View Post
Thanks everyone. I know you are right. I just feel so damn angry and hopeless sometimes. I would rather have spent the last ten years smoking weed and taking ecstasy tablets. I have no doubt they would have done me less harm. I never dreamed that an anti-depressant could have left me numb from the waist down.
i was thinking exactly this today too.
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2000 Effexor for arm pain from keyboard, told I had a chemical imbalance it would fix my arm not infrmd of its nature , CT off Effexor psych panic tearful
2000-2010 paroxetine(paxil) 2failed attempts to quit
Jan10- Sept10 clueless 9 mnth self calc taper hell
28 Sept10 drug free..psych & emot. torture
8 feb12 windows of nrmlty(16 mnths)
28 Sept12 stabilising (24 mnths) (what anightmare)
2013;If I was enmy cmbtnt and nz army did this to me someone would be dragged to the Hague and jailed!
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Old 07-13-2012, 03:16 AM   #10
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Re: Chemically castrated

Just to throw something else into the mix...............................................and I am by no means saying that it isn't the medication but I knew of a bloke, healthy, no medication, no previous drama's but all of a sudden because he couldn't get an erection once he went into a slight obsession about it which in turn stopped him having an erection for a long time.

The more he focused on it the less he could get it to function.

I suppose what I am trying to say is that maybe the worry of the situation and pure frustration is prolonging the symptom.

Or I could just be talking out of my a**e cause I don't have a penis :-)
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Old 07-13-2012, 03:19 AM   #11
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Re: Chemically castrated

Quote:
Originally Posted by Helen-Kate View Post
Just to throw something else into the mix...............................................and I am by no means saying that it isn't the medication but I knew of a bloke, healthy, no medication, no previous drama's but all of a sudden because he couldn't get an erection once he went into a slight obsession about it which in turn stopped him having an erection for a long time.

The more he focused on it the less he could get it to function.

I suppose what I am trying to say is that maybe the worry of the situation and pure frustration is prolonging the symptom.

Or I could just be talking out of my a**e cause I don't have a penis :-)
im sorry but you have no idea .!....if only it was that simple.
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2000 Effexor for arm pain from keyboard, told I had a chemical imbalance it would fix my arm not infrmd of its nature , CT off Effexor psych panic tearful
2000-2010 paroxetine(paxil) 2failed attempts to quit
Jan10- Sept10 clueless 9 mnth self calc taper hell
28 Sept10 drug free..psych & emot. torture
8 feb12 windows of nrmlty(16 mnths)
28 Sept12 stabilising (24 mnths) (what anightmare)
2013;If I was enmy cmbtnt and nz army did this to me someone would be dragged to the Hague and jailed!
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Old 07-13-2012, 03:22 AM   #12
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Re: Chemically castrated

Sorry, I shouldn't have posted. Your right I don't know how it feels. Just trying to put a more positive spin on things.

Sorry for any offence caused.
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Old 07-13-2012, 03:42 AM   #13
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Re: Chemically castrated

Your forgiven, ...from one very scared male.....
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2000 Effexor for arm pain from keyboard, told I had a chemical imbalance it would fix my arm not infrmd of its nature , CT off Effexor psych panic tearful
2000-2010 paroxetine(paxil) 2failed attempts to quit
Jan10- Sept10 clueless 9 mnth self calc taper hell
28 Sept10 drug free..psych & emot. torture
8 feb12 windows of nrmlty(16 mnths)
28 Sept12 stabilising (24 mnths) (what anightmare)
2013;If I was enmy cmbtnt and nz army did this to me someone would be dragged to the Hague and jailed!
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Old 07-13-2012, 03:51 AM   #14
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Re: Chemically castrated

Are your other symptoms better mark?
PSSD isnt that bad is it? I mean compared to the anxiety, dp, depression and all?
Personally i would trade it right away in a heartbeat. No more mental hell in trade for the rest of my life no sex;..in a heartbeat.
Thats not saying that pssd can be very rough for people. But i figured that once you have been through the other hell of WD;..pssd is a breeze.
I havent had sex in 3 years and cant say i miss it. Especially not feeling like this.

Off course not trying to diminish your problems, since i dont know them. Its just my point of view on pssd.
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14 years on Paxil 20 mg cause of a bad anxiety disorder (social anxiety, agoraphobia)
2011 Oct 16th: Cold turkey stop Paxil cause of poopout and switch to lexapro 15 mg. Hell started. Tapered lexapro. Tapered oxazepam. Med-free for 16 months. Now on Anafranil (clomipramine)


"....We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality. It can not command, only serve..."
Albert Einstein.
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