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General Discussion Open discussion about Paxil, Paxil Withdrawal, successes and progress, good stories and bad, with and without.

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Old 04-19-2012, 02:47 AM   #1
android3
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 3
Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

Dear friends,

I was on 40mg Paroxetine from 2008-2010. As a naturally anxious and timid guy, Paxil allowed me to be relatively social, fearless, and less hyper-sensitive. Before I knew it, the lows of my life were a distant memory, as were the fulfilling highs.

At the point I decided I had had enough, I was sleeping 12 hours a night, drinking like a fish, and desperately missing my sex drive. Life had become what seemed very plain and artificial. So I did a very foolish and impulsive thing as had become typical of me at the time; I quit. Cold Turkey.

I probably don't need to detail too much of the hell that immediately followed, because I'm sure most of you can understand what it's like to some degree. But yeah, it was hell.

I will just note two very significant things that happened to me during this time (within the first 60 days after I quit). First, a very close friend of mine killed himself. Second, I sustained an injury to my neck and shoulder that has resulted in chronic pain and discomfort that persists to this very day.

Although I've made it through the last 18 months, I am utterly exhausted physically and emotionally. I thought I was depressed before paxil, but I can say with a certainty that was nothing compared to the depression I've known post paxil. I am depressed, and I feel like it's taking its toll on my health.

Everything I've endured over the last 18 months, I've pretty much endured alone. I am not a person that often asks for help, or shares his problems. And this is one of the few times I've opened up about all this. I've become quite reclusive because frankly I am miserable.

So I have begun playing with the idea of getting back on the drug. I am thinking that I would rather be numb than feeling the way I do.

I would welcome any suggestions from you good people.

Thanks for reading, and best wishes.
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Old 04-19-2012, 03:40 AM   #2
Bilo76
 
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

You cold turkey stopped from 40 mg paxil? Damnnnn that will follow you around for a while.
I will let people more communicative then me reply to your post.
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Bilo aka Remco


14 years on Paxil 20 mg cause of a bad anxiety disorder (social anxiety, agoraphobia)
2011 Oct 16th: Cold turkey stop Paxil cause of poopout and switch to lexapro 15 mg. Hell started. Tapered lexapro. Tapered oxazepam. Med-free for 16 months. Now on Anafranil (clomipramine)


"....We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality. It can not command, only serve..."
Albert Einstein.
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Old 04-19-2012, 04:56 AM   #3
jheaney1
 
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

It's been a long time, reinstating may be a mixed bag. It may improve your situation. I reinstated, and am in the strange place where I feel Paxil re-affecting me, and still have some mild withdrawal symptoms. For me, it's still better than full blown withdrawal, or full blown Paxil use. I wish I could have toughed it out and gotten through withdrawal rather than existing in this limbo.
I think that you might be close to making it through withdrawal. It's hard to gauge because everyone takes a different amount of time to withdrawal. If you do reinstate, you should be able to start at a lower dosage rather than going back to 40mg/day.
I hope you feel better soon, withdrawal is a terrible feeling.
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2000 - 2011: 40mg
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7-2011: 25mg
8-2011: 20mg
9-2011: 15mg
10-2011: 10mg
11-2011: 0mg
1-2012: (crash) 10mg
4-24-12: 9mg
6-11-12: 8.1mg
7-26-12: 7.5mg
9-24-12: 6.8mg
11-11-12: 6mg
2-14-13: 5mg
7-21-13 4.5mg
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Old 04-19-2012, 10:00 AM   #4
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

Quote:
I was sleeping 12 hours a night, drinking like a fish, and desperately missing my sex drive. Life had become what seemed very plain and artificial.
Paxil may or may not work for you, you will have try this. It has been a long time since you took it and for some of us this drug is a one time wonder. If you want to try it again, don't start at 40mg, that will shock your CNS. So talk to your psyc first.
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Started April /03-Jul 30/11 10 mg Paxil
2nd Paxil Tapering
Off as of May 28th, 12


"This will take time but it will happen!"
"I've been shouting: it takes at LEAST a year " -- Ariella
"If I am going to suffer, at least I will be Paxil free" -- me!



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Old 04-19-2012, 12:48 PM   #5
mapleleafgirl25
 
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

if you quit cold turkey off that amount..you could suffer for a very long time...i have re-instated 2 x after being off for almost a year..i was fine both times..but you can only know if you try ...and i would start off on a low dose of 10mgs
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Taper:
05/27/2010 - 03/12/12: Tapered From 20mgs - 6.2 (2years)
04/11/2012 - 6.0 - 3.4 - 05/05/2013 (Third year into Taper)
06/04/2013 - 3.2
07/04/2013 - 3.0
08/03/2013 - 2.8
09/03/2013 - 2.6
10/04/2013 - 2.4
11/03/2013 - 2.2
12/03/2013 - 2.0
01/02/2014 - 1.8 (4th year of taper starting and home stretch)
02/01/2014 - 1.6
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Old 04-19-2012, 01:23 PM   #6
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

I would not ever go back on paxil. Your decision is on you though and only you can decide to put that pill back in your body if you want. If I were you I would look at this another way.

You have for sure seen the good and bad of the drug and have no doubt said to yourself you would never do this again or that the bad eventually out weighed the good. You may have even said "if I could go back I would have done this or that".....

Well here is your chance. My advice would be to try everything in your power to NOT go back to paxil or any AD. Do what we all wish we could have done. Give all options other than an AD a try first. You say you don't normally talk so I think giving behavioral theropy a shot would be my first step.

Can't hurt, worst case scenerio you go back on paxil but can at least tell yourself you tried everything that was safe before the latter.

Now I am assuming all this with the idea that you are very down and out but of no danger to yourself or others. If that is the case then seeking any help to get out of that state before you plan your next move of attack would be reccomended including reinstating paxil.

Seems like you are on a good start just by being here and acknowledging you are in a bad place and want to fix it. Good luck and I think you will do fine no matter what you decide.
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Old 04-20-2012, 04:31 AM   #7
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

Hi
I am also considering reinstating paxil, I went from 30mg paxil to 30 mg of prozac about 3 months ago and weaned off the prozac within a month, since then I went back to 10mg and then back up to 20mg, I have felt so sick and depressed, anxious and very zoned out, I hate it... I have been to psych doc and she said prozac and we are not working so I could try zoloft or go back on paxil. I was really nervous about trying anything new and I am also scared to go back to paxil as it is terrible to get off. So I feel really conflicted about what to do also, I have a week before I am supposed to start paxil again so I guess I have some thinking to do. Some of the stories about reinstatement seem really scary to me also.
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2003 started 20mg paxil after having panic attacks
2009 went cold turkey for 5 days and ended up in hospital, dosage increased to 40mg.
2010 tried to taper off slowly but found too hard got down to 30mg.
2012 direct change from paxil to prozac 30mg
2 weeks without paxil have had minor paxil withdrawl symptoms but new symtoms from new meds have cut down from 30mg prozac to 10mg over 2 weeks.
10/2/12 down to 10mg every 3 days
2 weeks with nothing
7/3/12 back on prozac 20mg
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Old 04-20-2012, 06:01 AM   #8
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kiwi_Girl View Post
Hi
I am also considering reinstating paxil, I went from 30mg paxil to 30 mg of prozac about 3 months ago and weaned off the prozac within a month, since then I went back to 10mg and then back up to 20mg, I have felt so sick and depressed, anxious and very zoned out, I hate it... I have been to psych doc and she said prozac and we are not working so I could try zoloft or go back on paxil. I was really nervous about trying anything new and I am also scared to go back to paxil as it is terrible to get off. So I feel really conflicted about what to do also, I have a week before I am supposed to start paxil again so I guess I have some thinking to do. Some of the stories about reinstatement seem really scary to me also.
Your story is a little different than the OP. In your case I think going back to paxil, reinstating, and doing a proper slow wean is the ticket. I know it is hard to go back to something you so don't want to but I wish I had done that. I really don't reccomned adding a 3rd different type of drug to the mix.
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Old 04-20-2012, 10:15 AM   #9
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

I reinstated Effexor after being off for about a month, but found I could no longer tolerate the original dose, so now I'm on half of what I was on before.

You could always try 10mg or so, just to see if you can tolerate it, and if you can then maybe go up to 20mg or so?
__________________
2003-2005: Paroxetine
2006-2009: Citalopram
2009-2011: Effexor
Aug/Sept 11: Effexor -> Mirtazapine
Oct: C/T Mirtazapine -> Effexor
Nov/Dec: Fast Tapered Effexor - w/d hell
5/2/12: Reinstated Effexor 37.5mg
20/2/12: Updosed 75mg
9/3/12: Dropped 37.5mg
30/4/12: 33.8mg
1/5/12: 37.5mg
4/5/12: 35.6mg
19/6/12: Dropped 2.5%
23/6/12: 35.6mg
29/6/12: 37.5mg
30/6/12: 35.6mg
17/7/12: 37.5mg
Yes, I know it's messy...
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Old 04-20-2012, 10:35 AM   #10
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

Try something low if you have to. Like 10mg but no more than 20mg. Go up slowly, and give it like 8 weeks. If it does not work, then it will be much easier to taper off.

This is a gamble and only you can decide ....
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Started April /03-Jul 30/11 10 mg Paxil
2nd Paxil Tapering
Off as of May 28th, 12


"This will take time but it will happen!"
"I've been shouting: it takes at LEAST a year " -- Ariella
"If I am going to suffer, at least I will be Paxil free" -- me!



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Old 04-20-2012, 03:49 PM   #11
Kiwi_Girl
 
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

Thanks guys I think going back is the right decision too, I guess its just a bit scary and I had terrible anxiety last night which hasn't helped and no sleep so I had to take lorazepam to help and have been probably been having too much of that while on the prozac as I felt as I couldn't relax.
My p/doc said to wait a week after stopping prozac before starting back on paxil, would starting any earlier be an option as I am feeling pretty crappy and I have only stopped 2 days ago.
__________________
2003 started 20mg paxil after having panic attacks
2009 went cold turkey for 5 days and ended up in hospital, dosage increased to 40mg.
2010 tried to taper off slowly but found too hard got down to 30mg.
2012 direct change from paxil to prozac 30mg
2 weeks without paxil have had minor paxil withdrawl symptoms but new symtoms from new meds have cut down from 30mg prozac to 10mg over 2 weeks.
10/2/12 down to 10mg every 3 days
2 weeks with nothing
7/3/12 back on prozac 20mg
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Old 04-21-2012, 03:25 AM   #12
Bilo76
 
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Re: Considering crawling back to paxil and begging for a second chance

KiwiGirl,..why did you do that direct change from paxil to prozac 30mg in the first place? Were you unhappy with paxil at that moment? Didnt it work for you anymore?
__________________
Bilo aka Remco


14 years on Paxil 20 mg cause of a bad anxiety disorder (social anxiety, agoraphobia)
2011 Oct 16th: Cold turkey stop Paxil cause of poopout and switch to lexapro 15 mg. Hell started. Tapered lexapro. Tapered oxazepam. Med-free for 16 months. Now on Anafranil (clomipramine)


"....We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality. It can not command, only serve..."
Albert Einstein.
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